I'm not sure why but today is 1 of those days that I "feel" it more than others. There is only a couple weeks of school left and I know I should be getting ready for Dustin's 6th grade graduation, but i'm not. I should be planning summer activities for 2 children, but I'm not. I should be doing laundry for 4, but i'm not. I should be holding and kissing 2 children, but i'm not. OH God!! why, why is my son not here? Don't you see and hear me cry for him? Can't you see the pain I'm in? Why don't you care? Why did you do this to my family? I have waited over a year for you to answer and I have come to realize you have left me too