1) It is OK to say "I Don'T Know What To Say" This straight forward response acknowledges the loss 2) "I was thinking about(child) Today" This shows us that the child make an impact on other people besides the family 3) "How is Today Going" this is much better than asking if we are better. 4)Please ask "How The Other Children Doing" This shows us you really are concerned about the family. If you can't think of anything to say or you fear you might say something stupid ....Just give them a hug and say I am thinking about you and your family.Grieving parents don't always need to hear something clever.We just need to have someone who is willing to listen, and cry with us.